Day 10 of 12 Days of Self-Care

For today I invite you to take a look at what you've associated with caring.  It can also be beneficial to look at what you've associated with love.  One of the capacities we have is to form associations between qualities based on having experienced them at the same time.  What often follows that is mistaking one thing for another.  It's an efficient tool for aiding in memory and recall, but it can lead to confusion.  Where it can get us in trouble is if we make assumptions based on having experienced things together.  For instance, if someone who cared for you also required to submit to their authority it may lead you to associate caring with submission and assume that they always go together.  So when you want to care for yourself you may end up submitting to someone else's idea or belief of what that means or what the right thing to do is, which may or may not be right for you.  Another example is if someone worried in the name of caring for you it would lead you to associate worry with caring, when in fact worry arises from fear and self-serving motives and conveys distrust, whereas caring is born of love and acknowledges the best interests of someone and uplifts, supports and encourages them.  

As we become aware of these associations, we can distinguish different elements so that one doesn't have to come along with another.  Caring is caring, worry is worry, submission is submission.  Through this type of acknowledgment discernment can be developed and the ability to perceive what's what.  So, tuning into where your at, what have you associated with caring or with love that you no longer have to?  Caring can come without worry.  Caring can come without having to feel bad about yourself.  Caring can come along with inspiration and empowerment.  Love can come without control.  Love can come with deep appreciation and trust.  It can be a game changer when these distinctions are made.  It will ensure that one thing is not confused with another.  And it'll alleviate any assumptions, for instance, that love comes with pain, or that caring comes with obligation.  Even if this has been the case, or you had experiences when they did come together, it doesn't mean that'll continue to be the way it is.  If you'd like an exercise to assist to distinguish caring from other characteristics you can read my blog: What is True Caring?

So, I wonder how much more free we can be of these associations that prevent true Self-Care and Self-Love.  It'll change how we are with ourselves and how we are with the people in our lives when this is clarified.  If you're having a hard time becoming aware of your associations and would like support with please get in touch through my session page.  How much more can your Self-Care be enhanced and enriched?  Perhaps it's time for it to gently modified or even radically transformed. Either way, I wonder how much ease you can have in the process.