Day 8 of 12 Days of Self-Care

There is this human tendency to distract and dissociate when things get stressful.  Coping with distress or tension can involve trying to get away from it.  Often this translates as the mind becoming more active and the emotional body being vacated, so as to not feel the intensity of the reality.  Physically this can show itself as a sense of anxiety or panic.  In order to reverse this trend it's important to acknowledge that it is a valid strategy.  It does "work" so as to reduce the perceived level of discomfort.  However, as a loving act of Self-Care we can learn to shift the momentum in the opposite direction.  We can learn to become more present and available to the physical and emotional aspects of ourselves so as to offer new resources and support to reduce the stress.  Directionally speaking, instead of moving up and out in times of stress, we learn to go down and in, fully occupying our body with our attention and supporting our emotional body to regulate itself and gain resilience.  This translates into being able to take more effective and relevant action in our day to day lives.

A few years ago I was downtown in a big city and I witnessed myself beginning to dissociate and become less emotionally present as I was looking around seeing things that I found painful to witness.  It was a big moment for me to consciously reverse the trend, and acknowledge that turning away or leaving was not the way to demonstrate that I didn't like seeing something, instead I had to learn how to gain the capacity to see and understand the dynamics that I was witnessing and acknowledge that it was the reality.  To read about the insights I had closer to the event itself you can go to my blog called, Presence & Preference.

So, with regards to your Self-Care, where have you checked out, that you can now choose to check in?  Often we witness other people distracting or dissociating when things get tough and learn to do the same.  There are other strategies that are much more powerful and supportive of long-term health and well-being.  When we learn how to give our attention fully to our physical and emotional body in times of stress we can feel palpable and dramatic reduction in tension, which has the added bonus of calming the mind and supporting you to think more clearly.  It may be difficult or uncomfortable at first to become more available and present physically and mentally when things are challenging, but it can be a game changer in terms of enhancing your quality of life and enabling you to be resilient and resourceful. 

If you find it difficult to give yourself this kind of presence and attention I'd be happy to serve as a role model for you, doing it for you initially, so that you can quickly and easily learn to do it for yourself.  If you'd like to have a free 20 minute consultation to see whether working together can benefit you please get in touch through my session page.  I wonder what new strategies and approaches to Self-Care can become available now.  I wonder how much more we can learn to check in and resource, instead of check out and avoid.  The solutions can present when we're home, so to speak.  If we're out to lunch we'll never get the message.  May we all get the message, learn new skills and awaken our capacity to love and care for ourselves more than ever before!