Beyond Success or Failure

Bring to mind someone who in your eyes is successful.  Think about, or write down the "why" of their being successful. What is it that defines them as a success?  Now bring to mind someone who in your eyes is a failure, or is failing at something or in life in general.  How do you know that they are failing?  What are the defining elements of that scenario?  Now, tune into where you are at now.  Where would you place yourself on the continuum? Are you more of a success or more of a failure?  What internal or external experiences or conditions are you using to verify whether you're succeeding or failing?

For many of us, we're coming to the end of receiving value from defining something as a success or a failure.  We're stepping beyond this model of evaluation and the thoughts, feelings and emotions that are based on the definition.  If you define your or something or someone as a failure, the accompanying thoughts, feelings and emotions are typically negative, full of guilt and shame, permeated with this sense of wrongness, missing the mark, confusion, being left out or left behind, just not getting it, lacking support, lacking resources, lacking intelligence or motivation or the wherewithal to change.  What comes along with the definition of success is feeling good, high, right, accomplished, celebrated, congratulated, appreciated by others, admired, part of the group, finding your way, on track, having your ducks in a row, being smart, having made good choices and more.  Or sometimes the reverse is a reality, where success leads to isolation, people hating you for "being better" than them, separation, superiority/inferiority etc. and failure leads to getting help, people being there to support, having more company, having more connection, feeling safe in not being a threat to anyone etc.  Tune into what it is for you. 

Imagine stepping into the reality, "I am a failure."  Embody it fully, notice the thoughts, notice the feelings, notice the emotions, notice the evidence, people who could confirm that for you, people who would agree with that assessment.  Now take a deep breath and imagine the whole "I am a failure" reality dissolving, within you and around you, as though the universe was coming in and lifting it out of you.  Are you ready to step beyond this?

Imagine stepping into the reality, "I am a success."  Embody it fully, notice the thoughts, notice the feelings, notice the emotions, notice the people around, notice their affirmations, their praise, or whatever they are doing or being in that reality.  Now take a deep breath and imagine the whole "I am a success" reality dissolving, within and around you, as though the universe was coming in and lifting it out of you.  Are you ready to step beyond this?

If we're locked into the need or necessity to be a success and not be a failure, we don't get to be all that we are.  We only get to be what will create "success" according to whatever version of that we've inherited.  And, we spend an enormous amount of energy trying to avoid being or doing anything that would lead to "failure" according to the failure template we were given.  When you choose to be you and step beyond the success/failure templates, you get to create a life that is true for you, whatever that includes.  As you do this some people may perceive you as succeeding, some people may perceive you as failing, but it ceases to matter because you know it doesn't actually mean anything, other than the significance, meaning or importance that has been assigned to it.

So, what if right now you could choose to know what's true for you.  If success and failure didn't exist, what would you choose?  Where would you show up?  With whom?  What would you be doing?  What would change?  Tune into where you are, be willing to have the judgments and should/should not's lifted off, as if by magic.  Now begin, as who you are, from where you are, with what you have.