Fulfilling Your Desires

How many times have you been let down?  Tune into all the times your needs weren't met, no one was there, no one cared, no one knew how to meet your needs, or could even see or acknowledge what you needed.  Tune into the times you had desires but they were left unfulfilled.  You knew what you wanted but no one was there to give it to you, or guide and assist you to have it.  What did you do when your needs weren't met?  What did you do when your desires weren't fulfilled?  What did you make that mean about you?  What did you make that mean about your life?  What did you project into your future?  What did you think about yourself?  What did you feel?

What if right now we could collect all those thoughts, feelings, beliefs, projections, expectations, meanings, let down and "content", put it out in front of us, and surrender it.  Imagine all of us in a big circle, with a fire in the middle and offering it to the fire.  Are you willing to free yourself and your body from those experiences?  You don't have to know how, it's about the acknowledgement of it, the willingness to release it, and the choice to create new space for your needs to be met and your desires fulfilled now and in the future.  What if we could come together and create a space where that is possible.  There is a lot that happened before now, but if enough of us share this collective desire and intention it becomes possible to shift this.

Today all this was coming up big time for me.  It's like long ago I gave up on my needs being met and desires being fulfilled and went to work on meeting other people's needs and fulfilling their desires.  I gave up on my life in full expression and instead was the one who could precisely tune into someone else's body, thoughts, feelings, emotions, higher self, guides, past, present and future and be right there to assist them to shift, to receive what they desired, to have their needs to be seen, understood and met fully by me and all the consciousness I have chosen to have access to. Even though I love doing this work, I secretly screamed, when is it my turn?  If I transform enough people's lives will I finally get the chance to have my life transformed?  Even when I paid thousands of dollars for courses it was all in service of me doing my work to make other people's lives better.  Now I see how I was never included in that.  I went into debt so others could be more financially free.  I spent hours reading, studying, learning, questioning, contemplating so that other people didn't have to.  I am so amazing at being completely present, available and there for someone else, yet I had totally given up on receiving the same.  And even as people showed up in my life who could offer that, I didn't care enough about my life to truly be able to receive it. 

Now is the time to set the stage for something new.  I place all the experience of my needs not being met and desires not fulfilled into this fire and surrender it.  It happened, it was hard, I felt alone, I felt let down again and again, but I don't have to carry this anymore.  I don't have to carry this into my future.  I desire to love and be loved.  I desire to have my needs met and desires fulfilled, and care about my life again, as I so easily care for others.  Now is the time to re-establish balance.  No one else's life is more or less valuable then my own.  I don't have to die so that someone else can live, or deplete myself so someone else can access more energy.  I release all the either me or someone else is sacrificed, either me or someone else suffers, either me or someone else has to take the brunt of it, handle the burden, or carry the weight of mine or other people's unresolved past.

The time is now to re-claim our true desire to live, and thrive, love and be loved, express our gifts, celebrate and be celebrated.  Let's handle what we carry, release it all into the fire to be transmuted, and welcome in the space, the energy, the life force, the trust and the support to live again, free of the hurt and let down of times past, and free of all definitions of love that are mired in self depreciation and sacrifice.  We can all be and receive who we are.  The time is now to re-claim our joy of living and our capacity to express and receive.  Part of my joy is creating the space for all of us to be loved, supported, honoured, and cared for.  I include myself in this circle and welcome in the next evolution of my work.  Work that benefits and honours me as it contributes to others.  I wonder what's possible and available now.