When we’ve experienced incoming or outgoing boundary violations we fall out of touch with our natural integrity. An incoming boundary violation is when something we don't want to have happen happens and we have no say or choice in the matter. An outgoing violation is when something we need or value that is readily available to us is all of a sudden withdrawn or taken away without notice or without our say in the matter. If there was no resolution to these experiences, if we were just left in a state of confusion, shock or disbelief with no support to understand what happened and process through the physiological, emotional and mental aspects of it, then we often end up finding a way to cope that reduces our quality of life. Two common postures we take on are either being withdrawn and wounded, shut down and unavailable or being aggressive and angry, forcing or pushing our perspectives or stance onto others.
Being oriented in our natural integrity makes it possible for us to have situational awareness, receive information from our environment moment by moment, and thus respond in ways that are in alignment with what’s actually happening. If you notice that your response patterns don't match what's happening in your current environment, or you're having a hard time assessing what's happening and how to respond it may be beneficial to take stock of whether you've lost sight of this natural way of being, or if it has never been given the chance to be fully established in you. As our natural way of being is re-established or as we are restored to natural functioning, it's amazing how much that can support us to be physiologically balanced, psychologically at ease, emotionally responsive to our current conditions and spiritually available to see our place in the greater context of life.