Acknowledging Limiting Identities
Often we can form identities based on what other people tell us we're good at, or what we decide we're good at. As we awaken, or become more conscious, certain identities become limiting. Rather then assisting us to know ourselves deeply, they can prevent us from knowing and being who we are and instead keep us stuck playing certain roles for other people that may or may not actually benefit them. A few years ago I wrote a blog called, "Say Goodbye to Being Stuck" (you can read that blog here) and in it I talked about five common mental models that can prevent people from moving forward. They are the following: the problem - solution model, the broken - fixing model, the wounded - healing model, the wrong - correction model, and the clearing - expansion model.
We can end up forming identities based around these models. Examples include, being a good problem solver, being a fixer, being a healer, always looking for how things can be better (correcting what's wrong), or facilitating clearing or transformation. Even though these abilities are valuable, if we form identities around them, when there is no problem, nothing broken, no wound to address, nothing wrong or nothing to clear, we can feel useless, unimportant, without value or even worthless. When we are with people who don't require these things from us, we don't know what to do with ourselves! If our value as a person depends on being needed for these things, what happens when people around us become more empowered and capable of addressing these things on their own?
The invitation for today is to acknowledge any of these models you've formed an identity around and begin to consider what it would be like to include this ability as part of being you and get curious about who and what you are beyond this. Being you can include solving problems, but no longer will you or someone else have to have problems for you to solve in order for you to feel valuable or important. You can instead begin to acknowledge the value of being, the value of presence, the value of your choice to show up here and now in the moment that you're in, and the value of committing to your life. What would that change if your value wasn't dependent on other people being limited and needing you to solve, fix, heal, correct or clear something? What would it be like to have relationships based on presence, acknowledgment of being, and choice to be aware of what's possible to create and express? May we all know ourselves beyond these limited identities and re-claim the ease and joy of being and the capacity to contribute to new possibilities being available in the world now and in the future.
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Christine helps people to approach life with greater care, love & wisdom. offering presence and a unique quality of attention she can assist people to play an active role in their mental, emotional and physical health no matter what is going on. With all of the different tools and methods she has access to, she inspires, encourages and supports people to really love and honour themselves, and thus be more able to love and honour others. Through her patience, kindness and astute awareness of the body, mind and heart she accelerates people's self-healing journeys and makes the inner and outer world a whole lot easier to navigate!