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Asking and Receiving

3/5/2018

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I'm sure anyone reading this blog has heard the statement "ask and you shall receive".  Many teachings offer something like a recipe which includes asking for what you want, shifting into a state of allowance or non-resistance and receiving that which you have been asking for.  Ideally, this model would work seamlessly.  Often though, something is missing.  We ask and can't receive, or seem to be locked in a pattern of resistance.  Often we feel like we're missing something, have done something wrong or conclude that we just must not be worthy or deserving of having what we want.  From there we tend to go to work on finding out limiting beliefs that we carry.  What did we learn from Mom?  From Dad?  From our culture?  From our friends, siblings, extended family and school?  We're hunting for what's keeping us from receiving and having what we truly desire.  For a while this hunt or search is fun, illuminating, purposeful and even fulfilling. Eventually it tends to lose its luster.  It's no longer very exciting to go sifting through past experiences, or trying to ask the universe in the right way, or trying to figure out where our resistance is, or trying to figure out how to receive.  So, what do we do when we're tired of all this?  At some point there is a moment of surrender, alongside a natural inclination to go deeper.

One approach to going deeper is to imagine that you could begin anew, from where you are, as you are now.  It's no longer about change, or sifting through the past or trying to get your vision of the future just right so you can conjure up the emotion or feeling state that would it encourage it to show up in your life.  Instead, you can choose to take a deep breath and get curious about what it would be like to really know you, all aspects of you.  What does your heart know?  What does your body know?  What does your higher self or multi-dimensional self know?  As you come to know more of who you are the possibility becomes available to express more of who you are.  Then it becomes more about actualizing the fruits of the consciousness you've cultivated and calling forward possibilities that better reflect the truth of you.  The tricky thing with a lot of this is that words can only point to the true experience, which is more of an energetic and emotional reality than an intellectual one. 

From my point of view we're coming to the end of being able to solve the problems, heal the wounds, fix what's broken and correct what's wrong using the mind.  For many people the mind is tired, and on some level is ready for the heart and body to get to step up and contribute to the creation of a life that is more fulfilling and satisfying, as well as contributing to the creation of a world that works better for more people.  So, what is the invitation here?  It's to begin to ask how you can include your body, heart and mind in the creation of your life, while consulting your higher self and other guides that you may or may not yet be aware of.  The more all of you is included, the easier it will be to ask for and receive what nourishes you and benefits others.  When you are nourished and abundant, you're in a better space to gift and offer.  Allow yourself to gift and receive, and to value gifting and receiving.  Take the time to ask yourself what you most want and desire.  Often the desires and wants will be about gifting and receiving.  Both can be equally nourishing and nurturing.  What can you now choose to nurture and nourish yourself with?   I've included a link to listen to the recording of a meditation I offered online that can assist you to get more in touch with your body and the earth so that there is the space to gift and receive in a new way. 
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Calling Upon the Frequency of Freedom

2/20/2018

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Are there any patterns, people, places or things in your life that you feel victimized by?  Is there something you feel absolutely powerless to change?  Often anywhere that vibration of powerlessness exists we either react to it with anger or collapse into depression, sadness, grief, terror etc.  We typically have tried many things to cope with the experience.  The approaches are usually designed to try to escape the person, place, thing or pattern, destroy it, fight it, rage against it or control it.  At some point none of those things work.  This often leads to a point of surrender, or this moment of claiming, "I can't do this anymore."  We acknowledge things like: I don't know how to change this, I don't know how to fix this, I don't know how to heal this and I don't know how to solve this. 

I've included a meditation at the end of this blog that is designed to assist you to access the energy, space and consciousness of freedom.  We have a choice to ask for and receive different possibilities.  We can ask for freedom, ask for something different, ask for change and we can breathe deeply, be present and invite what many would deem as miracles to be born through us.  It's a form of quantum healing if you will.  It's un-explainable "how" the change happens.  It just does.  It's out of our control yet simultaneously our choice.  Are you willing to receive a miracle? What if you don't have to work all this out on your own.  Whatever you are carrying or experiencing is yours in the sense that you've inherited it or are playing it out, but these patterns and realities aren't unique to you, they are shared by many on this planet.  Would you like to be the one to change it for you?  And as you do, would you be willing to energetically contribute that possibility of transmutation and transformation to the rest of humanity?  You don't have to know how, your choice and willingness to is what invites the miracles to manifest.  Now is the time.

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Presence & Preference

2/7/2018

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As I was driving in downtown Vancouver the other day I was noticing my energy beginning to withdrawal.  I was becoming less and less present.  In that moment I chose to ask questions and receive the awareness of what was going on.  What came forward was that I was using presence or lack of presence to assert my preference. Because I didn't prefer what I was witnessing in the people and realities around me, I was beginning to withdrawal.  In that moment I got a very clear message to acknowledge the difference between presence and preference.  If I were to commit to being present regardless of preference I would have more choices available. 

So, I ask this question now: what would it be like to choose presence regardless of preference?  We can be completely present in and through our bodies, with the earth and with the realities around us and continue to acknowledge our preferences, as in, I enjoy this activity, I appreciate this, I don't like that, I wish that wasn't like that etc.  Many of us have either witnessed or practiced the withdrawal of presence being used in attempt to manipulate or control people or realities around us.  It's those moments in childhood where we would be ignored until we behaved in a way that people around us liked or preferred.  We desired their presence and attention so much, we would do almost anything for it, including only showing up in the way that they wanted us to, or trying desperately change anything or everything about us that they didn't respond favorably to.  The more awareness we can have about how we and the people around us have been conditioned, the more choice we have to release the conditioning and choose true empowerment.

True empowerment is being free of manipulation and control, fully living in a loved based reality where you and the people around you have choice.  In a loved based reality, we have preferences, needs, desires and requests, yet we don't use the withdrawal of love, presence and attention as a way to coerce others into meeting those needs or fulfilling those desires.  It is their choice to meet them or not.  It is their choice to contribute or not. Just as it is our choice to fulfill people's requests and desires and meet their needs or not.  The more and more we become truly receptive and responsive to the unified field, our higher selves, Source consciousness, or however you want to name that source of wisdom that goes beyond name, the easier it is to know what our choices will create.  If I help this person will they have a greater future?  If I choose this what will my life be like in 5 years?  If I choose this what will the world be like in 5 years?  More and more we can be love in action attuned to the wisdom that guides the unfolding of consciousness in form.  We can surrender old strategies of trying to get our way, or show up in the "right" way, as dictated by others, and instead have true choice, know what love is, and get to gift and receive beauty and all that benefits what we most desire being expressed and actualized here.  May we have as much ease as possible being our gifts, knowing what's possible and acting from a balance of love and wisdom that fuels creation in its highest expression.
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Beyond Coping

1/28/2018

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Coping can be defined as our capacity to find a way to be okay with the presence of what we don't want, or the absence of what we do want.  Many of us have become phenomenal at coping.  We have learned to rationalize why it's actually okay or even good that we don't have what we truly desire.  We have learned to view the presence of pain, lack, conflict, struggle, challenge, and obstacles as character building, or meaningful, or even a gift or "good for us."  When people are unkind, self-serving, manipulative, domineering or controlling we learn have compassion for them or try to spend some time in their shoes and contemplate what they must have lived through that has lead them to being this way.  When people let us down, don't show up when they say they will, don't consider what we need or want, never ask questions and hold expectations of us that only benefit them, we try to see the gift in that, or how it's inviting us to be more reflective, or assisting us to go within and see where we may do that with ourselves, or how it's supporting us to release attachment and develop more self-trust.  I could go on.  The key thing to acknowledge is that we have been brilliant, creative, and amazing at working with what's been in our realities, and who has been in our lives.  And now, what would it be like if none of this was required?  No matter how good we've gotten at coping, what if we don't have to continue doing it?

Many of us are already, or are about to line up with realities, people, places and things that can honor our hearts, meet our needs, and invite us to be our beauty, our gifts, our greatness, and provide avenues to express our love and creative genius and receive the love and support we've always desired.  So, what is beyond coping?  What if we are soon to find out?  As we step into being, receiving and having more of what's true for us, in alignment with what we know is possible, we don't lose any skill sets we've cultivated.  If we do intersect realities, people, places and things that do require the skill set of coping or adapting, we can apply that skill, it's just that from my perspective, now is the time to release all expectations of having to cope in order to live and be here.  We can begin to create realities beyond coping.  It is possible now.

One thing to keep in mind, is that sometimes we've set up relationships or structured our lives to support our limitations rather than our greatness.  So in this transition from knowing our uniqueness through limitation to knowing our uniqueness through our greatness, there can be a lot of adjustments to be made.  There can be times when we may even grieve the loss of limitations, because their absence can be so unfamiliar to our nervous system or mental or emotional state that it feels like a void.  Imagine if you've set your whole life up to manage pain and then the pain is gone.  What do you do now?  We usually expect that the freedom from limitations will feel amazing, but often times it feel super relieving and amazing at first, and then there is a process of rebuilding our lives and restructuring everything we do.  The more we can name what really goes on in these huge transitions, the easier of a time we can have with them.  We won't be as surprised if we feel tremendous grief when we receive a deeply loving relationship.  The presence of what we truly desire often serves as a catalyst to transmute and release the pain of its absence.  If we expect everything to be and feel amazing when we have what we truly desire, we can become very confused when it doesn't.  So, all of this said, may all of us have as much ease as possible walking our paths, receiving the gifts available to us now, cultivating relationships based on love and trust and being gentle with ourselves as we progressively acknowledge and release what has been to fully live what is now.
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Being Completely Resourced

1/22/2018

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What would it be like to have what you've never had?  What would it be like to receive what you've never received?  What would it be like to know what you've never known?  What would it be like to be what you've never been?  Now is the time to welcome in a new energetic and emotional blueprint that can serve as a foundation to create your life from.  People often talk about quantum leaps or timeline jumping.  Ultimately what this is about is choosing to create from a space and energy of possibility that's available now, rather than from past reference points.  Instead of affirming who and what you've been through continued action to solidify that, you can serve the consciousness within you, which ultimately benefits all and allows for expansion to take place.  What is expansion?  It's the choice and capacity to go beyond what has been, whether as an internal experience of self, or as external experience of life and living.  It's a process of including more consciousness in and as you.  Some name this as awakening, or evolution, or enlightenment.  What is beyond names that you can now include in your experience of living?

It is an exciting time in that our perception of the emotional and energetic experience of life and living is rapidly changing.  It can feel like an acceleration, either as a progression, or as bouts of distinct moments of waking up to a different way of being, or seeing, or knowing yourself and others.  Our experience of relationship can dramatically change too, as many of the walls of separation come down and it becomes much easier to energetically know people and emotionally relate to people.  Especially as the light of consciousness permeates through the mental and emotional realms, new space can be created.  Where there was once density there is now availability for love and wisdom to be claimed, acknowledged and expressed.  There is less distortion and less confusion.  The conflicting agendas cease to be, and in their place becomes an ease of knowing what's true and living with that knowing intact.  I wonder what's possible now as we choose to be completely resourced?  Yesterday I led a meditation online with this theme.  You can listen to it here:

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Acknowledging Limiting Identities

1/19/2018

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Often we can form identities based on what other people tell us we're good at, or what we decide we're good at. As we awaken, or become more conscious, certain identities become limiting.  Rather then assisting us to know ourselves deeply, they can prevent us from knowing and being who we are and instead keep us stuck playing certain roles for other people that may or may not actually benefit them.  A few years ago I wrote a blog called, "Say Goodbye to Being Stuck" (you can read that blog here) and in it I talked about five common mental models that can prevent people from moving forward.  They are the following: the problem - solution model, the broken - fixing model, the wounded - healing model, the wrong - correction model, and the clearing - expansion model.

We can end up forming identities based around these models.  Examples include, being a good problem solver, being a fixer, being a healer, always looking for how things can be better (correcting what's wrong), or facilitating clearing or transformation.  Even though these abilities are valuable, if we form identities around them, when there is no problem, nothing broken, no wound to address, nothing wrong or nothing to clear, we can feel useless, unimportant, without value or even worthless.  When we are with people who don't require these things from us, we don't know what to do with ourselves!  If our value as a person depends on being needed for these things, what happens when people around us become more empowered and capable of addressing these things on their own?

The invitation for today is to acknowledge any of these models you've formed an identity around and begin to consider what it would be like to include this ability as part of being you and get curious about who and what you are beyond this.  Being you can include solving problems, but no longer will you or someone else have to have problems for you to solve in order for you to feel valuable or important.  You can instead begin to acknowledge the value of being, the value of presence, the value of your choice to show up here and now in the moment that you're in, and the value of committing to your life.  What would that change if your value wasn't dependent on other people being limited and needing you to solve, fix, heal, correct or clear something?  What would it be like to have relationships based on presence, acknowledgment of being, and choice to be aware of what's possible to create and express?  May we all know ourselves beyond these limited identities and re-claim the ease and joy of being and the capacity to contribute to new possibilities being available in the world now and in the future.
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Unraveling Enmeshment Trauma

1/10/2018

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What is enmeshment trauma?  Enmeshment trauma is when there is an emotional consequence to having a want, need, desire or preference that differs from the people around you, or someone else gets to decide what you want and need and it isn't okay to disagree.  If you do want or need something different then they're offering it's met with scoffing, withdrawal, judgment, condemnation or punishment of some sort.  In this type of environment one of the strategies to avoid the consequence is to get very good at external referencing, which is about checking in with the wants, needs, desires and preferences of those around you before checking in, so that you insure that you only express the ones that match theirs.  Another strategy is to take on a role of being a helper, peacemaker or caregiver.  What this role requires is to be tuned in or responsive to the needs, wants, desires and preferences of others.  And in some cases, the more effectively you can suppress yours, the more completely you can be tuned into theirs.  Often you will be praised, and loved, and appreciated for your amazing capacity to help and be there for people and often the best form of safe connection will come through maintaining those roles.

At some point however, you may be met with the most feared questions of all....What do you want?  What do you need?  What do you desire?  What are your preferences?  It will often come from someone who has no idea what enmeshment trauma is, and is confused when you freeze, go completely blank, stutter, and say I don't know.  To make matters worse, they may respond with something like, what's wrong with you?  Why don't you know?  The reason why you don't know is because it didn't actually benefit you to know in the environments you've been in!  It would have been a threat, very unsafe, and made you a target for the worst to come out of those who could not provide space and allowance for different perspectives, wants, needs, desires and preferences.

So, what do you do now?  The first step is asking yourself: do I desire to know what I want and need?  Would I like to be able to voice my preferences?  Would I like to be able to articulate what I love and desire and appreciate especially when it differs from the people around me?  To those who have enmeshment trauma even the thought of this is terrifying. This energy will often show up through the nervous system and emotional body as tension, and constriction alongside this thought that something very bad is going to happen.  Now is the time to breathe deeply into that energy.  Breathe into that tension.  Acknowledge that many very bad things did happen, or someone threatened that they would happen if you didn't stay in line with who and what they wanted or needed you to be.  Tune into your body, heart, mind, higher self and ask: Is it different now?  Are there people who can allow for difference?  Is it okay to want, need and desire things that different than the people around me? Is it okay to release the role of helper, peacemaker and caregiver?  You can still be responsive to other peoples needs, however, you now have the opportunity to include yours too.  All boundaries are is the assertion of your preference.  It's you knowing when you've listened enough to someone's difficulties, or helped enough with the homework, or demonstrated enough compassion, whatever 'enough' is for you.

What if now is the time when you don't have to leave yourself to love others?  What would it be like if you knew that you didn't have to exclude yourself to have connection?  What if you don't have to make others people's needs, wants, desires and preferences more important than your own?  What if you could include yours and be responsive to theirs?  What if it is not an either/or?  Get curious about what it would be like if you could be there for others when it felt good to do so and you could say no when it didn't.  How different would it be, if when you started feeling depleted you could acknowledge that and make another choice?  Re-claiming awareness of what's true for you while being a contribution to those that you meet is the next step in unraveling enmeshment trauma.  Choosing people where it is okay to think, feel and know something different then they do and have the experience of still being in relationship, or having connection, or being there with them as they're being with you is a huge step in letting yourself know that it can be different than it has been.  

Truly, what if something different is possible now?  And if someone does make you feel wrong for stating a need, desire or preference and subsequently begins to deliver some sort of emotional consequence, you can take a deep breath, stare squarely at them, acknowledge what's taking place, access compassion for the memories of manipulation and control that you believed was love, acknowledge where they are coming from and speak from the deepest love and highest wisdom you have access to, acknowledging in whatever words you choose that this is not what you're here for.  You're here for something different.  You're here for the new experience.  You're here to know yourself, and love yourself, and simultaneously know and love others.  And you're here to discover what you are here for, as and when you do, and you may not have the answers to any questions you are asked right now.  One day you will, and as the insights, revelations and breakthroughs come, you can celebrate.  And as you are now, you can celebrate.  What if you could live your life as a celebration?  If you would like assistance to unravel enmeshment trauma please get in touch.  I wonder what can change with more ease than you ever could have imagined?


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Including More of You

1/8/2018

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How much more of you can you include now?  That may seem like a strange question.  One of the things that we have interacted with a lot is that of the polarity of inclusion/exclusion.  We have tried many things in order to be included, even if it meant we had to exclude energies, preferences, desires, and more.  What have you decided that you have to exclude to include other people in your life?  What have you decided you have to exclude in order to include work, money, lovers, health, and joy in your life?  What if we no longer have to exclude to include?  And what if now is the time to acknowledge how much more of who we are can show up here and now in this life?

I lead a meditation for group online the other day with the theme of Strengthening Trust in Life.  One of the things that came up during that was acknowledging how the mind, heart and body had been separated out.  Some live in the mind and exclude the heart, or hate the body and love the mind, or make the heart everything and try to silence the mind etc.  A choice we have available now is to include the heart, mind and body in our transmission of consciousness.  What does this mean?  It means that the body, heart and mind can all express as the energy, space and consciousness that you are.  Another way of saying this is that love and wisdom can permeate through every cell of the body, radiate through the heart and be translated through the mind.  It can wake up in you, through you and as you.  You no longer have to live out old story lines about what the body is, what the heart is and what the mind is, and which one is more or less important.  How freeing would that be?  Inviting joy through your body, mind and heart, inviting ease, gratitude, gentleness, orgasmic energy, play, expansiveness, kindness and more.  What would you like to invite in and through your heart, mind and body?  It is all you, re-claiming you, being you, and showing up as you, here and now.  If you would like to listen in to the meditation here it is:

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Growing Up Emotionally

12/31/2017

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What if now is the time to receive everything we require to grow up emotionally?  For many, it has been a challenging time, primarily because there has been so much manipulation, domination and control of the emotional field.  We have been locked in these patterns trying to make ourselves or others feel something, or preventing ourselves or others from feeling something.  It's exhausting to live in this emotional reality.  Many have the desire to grow up or mature emotionally but often don't quite know how.  We desire to be free of the manipulation, domination and control, yet often end up in a state of resistance, fighting against what doesn't feel good.

Take a deep breath and imagine what it would be like to feel emotionally safe.  Begin to become curious about love based possibilities that inspire true thriving.  It's so easy to get stuck rejecting what we don't want, or fighting against what has been held in place for so long.  What if now, we can truly be supported to live beyond this?  Call in the energies of kindness, gratitude, peace and calm.  Imagine what it would be like to live with energetic ease that supports your emotional body being relaxed and responsive.  The emotional body can become an expression of your consciousness that assists you to thrive by providing information about the environment.  It is a tool of perceiving, something that can assist to know what's most light, expansive and true for you.

The key to growing up emotionally is to get curious about what it would be like to release any and all judgment about where you are now.  What often prevents us from receiving what we require to mature or develop emotionally, is that we are either in denial about the condition of our emotional body, or in judgment of it, wishing we were better off, wishing we were happy, at peace and enthusiastic about life.  With honesty about where we are, and the choice to direct our presence and attention towards it, we can welcome our higher self, wider self, or the consciousness that we are to show up and transmute what was previously held there.  We can awaken to a lighter experience of life and living, where we are aware of the manipulation, domination and control that goes on here, yet no longer have to live under the weight of that.  We can ask to be and receive the energy, space and consciousness of allowance, and direct our attention towards the choices available now, to be more resourced, loved and supported and to show up in our relationships from a space of greater love and wisdom.  As we step into 2018, may we receive all the love and support from within and through all forms to have the capacity to show up for this life and express our greatness in more ways than we can currently imagine.
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Choosing an Energetic & Emotional Re-Set

12/27/2017

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At the bottom of this post is a 10 minute audio, meditation style, to assist you to create an energetic and emotional re-set.  How much more support and contribution can you call into your life to assist you to thrive?  Now is the time to acknowledge and release our previous definitions of what we think "support" and "contribution" means, and what state of mind or set of circumstances we have to be in to receive it.  Many of us carry beliefs of having to diminish ourselves or be in difficult circumstances to receive support and contribution.  What if now is the time to change this?  We can invite life, the universe, and our higher selves to show us what true support and contribution is, beyond what we thought it was.  Imagine being gifted a new template or foundation that you can now build upon.  As we allow for the surrender of the old templates, foundations and beliefs, more empowering ones can be received, embraced and progressively expressed, calling new forms into our lives that better reflect the internal environments we've chosen to cultivate.

It's time to invite universal support into your life, and progressively allow other people and life circumstances to mirror that condition of support.  When we try to reach for support here, we often activate human realities that lead to scenarios of co-dependence and dis-empowerment.  People who help hold more power than people who need.  People who give are good and people who need are bad.  There are so many polarities of dis-empowerment that keep us from true contribution, which is the simultaneity of gifting and receiving.  These realities are being addressed, and more people are recognizing their limits and choosing beyond them.  How much more can we know what works?  How much more can we access our deepest love and highest wisdom and transform, transmute and resolve what previously kept us from having this readily available.  May we receive everything we require to thrive here.  And may we be and receive more love and true support than we've ever imagined possible.
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    Christine assists people to live creatively.  She offers one on one sessions, group meditations and group classes that invite people into this moment of NOW, the moment of choice, the moment where the learned rules of the game don't apply.  She facilitates people being able to see and know what's really going on and brings the light of awareness to the patterns, templates and beliefs that are driving behaviors.  She invites people to wake up, laugh, live and love, offering the invitation to expand, explore, play and get curious about what is possible to be, do, have and create.

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